So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize