is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
