Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
