Pregnant stripper...not hot.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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