But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
if i died would you start the facebook group?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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