Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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