Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Randomize
