If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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