that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Randomize
