How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
It's rum buckets o'clock
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Randomize
