11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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