he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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