what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Randomize
