Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
