im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You can't just leave with hair like that
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize