Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
