the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
