so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
