They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
