playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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