I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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