So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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