Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
