Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
