she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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