he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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