In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
