I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
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