Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
