...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
