her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize