It's like God shit irony all over that family
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
