If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
