He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
she pinky promised me she was 18
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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