Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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