no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
