We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
