people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
