On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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