She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
