Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
