He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
