She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
tell me about the eggs
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
