I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
