I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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