i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
