If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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