how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
