Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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