ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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